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Ukrainian military has apparently lost three of its trained dolphins in the Black Sea. "these dolphins have been trained to attack enemy combat swimmers using special knives or pistols fixed to their heads."

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Dolphin scientist Justin Gregg brings us this slightly disturbing, if hilarious, bit of Delphic news.
The Ukrainian military has apparently lost three of its trained dolphins in the Black Sea. Which might not be so bad, except.... Well, Gregg sets it up perfectly:

Uh oh - it seems the Ukrainian Navy has a small problem on their hands. After rebooting the Soviet Union's marine mammal program just last year with the goal of teaching dolphins to find underwater mines and kill enemy divers, three of the Ukrainian military's new recruits have gone AWOL. Apparently they swam away from their trainers this morning ostensibly in search of a "mate" out in open waters. It might not be such a big deal except that these dolphins have been trained to "attack enemy combat swimmers using special knives or pistols fixed to their heads." So if you are planning a family holiday to the Black Sea this week, I think it's best you avoid any "friendly" dolphins that might approach - especially if they have KNIVES or PISTOLS strapped to their heads.

Who would not want to watch the film adaptation of this story? It'd sort of be like abstract expressionist painting plus Free Willy plus Rambo. And it'd be told from the perspective of the dolphins with subtitles for their clicks. And filmed in 3D and at 48 frames a second. It would be directed by Werner Herzog. The first hour and twenty-eight minutes would be dolphins eating fish, the last two minutes would be them saving the world from terrorist combat swimmers.

The Ukrainian navy's dolphin program has a long pedigree. The Bulletin of Atomic Scientists noted that trainers there inherited the Soviet military's 70 trained dolphins after the Soviet Union collapsed. Some of them were retrained to help with child therapy and other civilian tasks. The others? Well...

theatlantic.com 

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